A Time to be Grateful

Monon in Carmel

“The single greatest thing you can do to change your life today would be to start being grateful for what you have right now. And the more grateful you are, the more you get.” – Oprah

As I sit here reflecting on Oprah’s quote I can’t help but think back over the past eight years and see the many blessings that have come my way since my daughter’s death. I believe a person needs to have great faith to see that and to believe that life can still have meaning after such loss. But also understanding that it will be different. Never the same.

I’m a fighter and I have always gotten back up and dusted myself off and took another step in faith that God has my back. He has up till now and I have every bit of faith that He will for the rest of my days. The problem is always me. I get in the way of my own recovery, my own journey because of my human nature to disbelieve.

Life has handed me more hurts and sorrows and at times I’ve often wondered how life could have any meaning left for me. It would be so easy for me to give up, to stop believing, to stop living.

But my faith is so much stronger than my disbelief.

And that my friends is where it begins and ends. So today I am thankful for my faith, for it has carried me this far. My Thanksgiving prayer for you all that is that you can find gratitude in the little things. It is the little things in life that rebuild faith, strength, foundational love and happiness.

Happy Thanksgiving

until next time

M

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Thanksgiving Message

“The single greatest thing you can do to change your life today would be to start being grateful for what you have right now. And the more grateful you are, the more you get.” – Oprah

As I sit here pondering Oprah’s quote I can’t help but think back over the past four years and see the many blessings that have come my way since my daughter’s death. I think a person needs to be able to have great faith to see that and to believe that life can still have meaning after such loss.

I’m a fighter and I always get back up and dust myself off and take another step in faith that God has my back. He has up till now and I have every bit of faith that He will continue to. The problem is always me. I get in the way of my own recovery, my own journey because of my human nature to disbelieve.

To believe that life has handed me so many hurts and sorrows how could life have any meaning left for me. It would be so easy for me to give up to stop believing to stop living. But my faith is so much stronger than my disbelief.

And that my friends is where it begins and ends. So today I am thankful for my faith, for it has carried me this far.

Happy Thanksgiving

until next time

m

Thanksgiving Message

Thanksgiving for the past 3 years has been extremely difficult for me. Losing my only child has made it very difficult to see the things I am thankful for. The things I should be thankful for. You have to understand – when life isn’t going so well – and you’ve lost all that you know to be true – it’s hard to see the blessings.

Monday, November 30th would have been her 21st birthday. Over the past 3 years her friends, family and I have celebrated it by eating Mac and Cheese and having a Starbucks Carmel Frappachino. But this year I just don’t even want to do that. In fact, the thought of it makes me nauseated.

This 3rd year seems to be harder than the last few years. Not sure why. Maybe just because. Or maybe because so many other parts of my life are a mess. The only good thing I got to hold onto is that I know God loves me. And that is what keeps me going. Because seriously if I didn’t have that – I wouldn’t be able to sustain the life I live now.

I was talking with some friends and I was telling them how I was feeling – they all said that they felt I was here to help others. That even though I have had some incredibly bad things happen in my life – that God is using me to help others. And on some levels I do see that, especially when I hear from people who have been helped either by my story or by my blog. But there are times when I feel I don’t have much left to give.

What does that say? It says I need to slow down and let God fill me back up. I need to receive a little bit. So for the next few days I will be spending that time with God – just me and Him. Talking, praying, reading – just being in His presence soaking up all He has to give me.

Until next time

M