Thursday I went to see my counselor and then onto my GriefShare Class. Very exhausting day and evening. I really didn’t have anything left to give after that. The counselor said I was where I should be and to stop being so hard on myself. I told her I was venturing into strange territory when it came to moving forward. To me it means taking care of someone I’ve never taken care of…..ME. I really don’t know what to do. I’ve always cared for others, family, husband, daughter, but never me. I’ve not really lived alone for very long. Memory serves me right, I never really cared for it then and I certainly didn’t make some good choices. Now I am faced with that again, and I don’t like it much.

The GriefShare class was on losing a child. huhhhhh – well that was very difficult to sit through. I cried when the video spoke of what losing a child means….

Things you won’t do…..

see the future as you once dreamed
see her graduate college or even high school
see her get married
see her have children
see her, feel her, hear her…..

again I say – BLAH!

until next time,


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