Of late I have begun to feel a need to be quiet. To quiet the slowing rising feeling in my gut that is telling me that I need to make a change. What kind of change I do not know. I just know I need to be quiet. To stop the madness; the constant barrage of data that comes into and out of my life is deafening.
I find it hard to concentrate these days. Words have not come to me; only mixed up thoughts and ideas that don’t make any sense. That is why I haven’t written any posts for a few days. I don’t think it’s anything serious – just some confusion on my part as to what is important to me now. I feel that it’s evolving into something other than what I believed my life was going to be like.
On some levels I am enjoying what I am doing, and on another level I feel I am not doing what I want to do. The problem what I want to do and what I can do are not on the same page. Probably not even in the same book.
So for now I will remain quiet and try and listen to my inner voice and the voice of God for some guidance and confirmation of what it is I’m suppose to be doing. For what purpose am I here? Because just existing isn’t good enough. Just getting by isn’t good enough – for my own sanity I must find a way to matter. That my existence is meaningful for me.
I know I’ll get there eventually – sooner would be better than later.
until next time